When the couple parts their ways

Your friend telling you that she may break-up with her boyfriend is never a pleasant conversation to have. Especially a break-up not due to an irreconcilable difference, but an inevitable situation is worse (not with my friend's case, I believe, but anyway). Some may decide to use marriage as a solution, while others decide break-up as a necessary thing in order to pursue one's dream. Actually, I witnessed a lot of couples moving-in as a solution to some circumstances, these days. I don't know how I feel about that even if they have a viable reason.

I guess when the relationship begins to last longer (than what you've expected), you start wondering where, when, and how it would end. It is never my intention to find out from the current boyfriend; he probably doesn't know the answer to that either. Life is a full of mystery. Each of us has dreams and goals to reach. However, I find it very challenging trying to achieve these dreams while having to find ways to make the relationship work and make both of us happy. Selfishly speaking, I maybe concerned more with my own happiness with him...

I realize that expectations sometimes brings disappointments. These expectations don't include such thing as marriage and likes. Sometimes it's just little things you wanted to do with him, but he thought otherwise. So, imagine talking about serious stuff. Marriage is not a kid's joke. It's a commitment, and it better be something that both people want. Perhaps pushing for it (when it can't be done at the moment) leads to a break-up that could've been prevented. At least, that seems to be reason with one my friend's situation.

If there is one thing that I learned from my friend's break-up is, to never have high expectations about the final destination of your relationship. If marriage or any sort of the 'next-step' is not discussed, then just keep on going. Take each day as a blessing and happiness to have the person in your life. At least, that's why I try to practice everyday.

It is hard trying not to think what would happen between us one-year, two-years, or five-years from now, especially for a person who likes to plan things ahead. It's difficult to always place my relationship in a "unknown and requires flexibility" category. However, planning the future already involves him (as for now). You begin to think where to apply for jobs or graduate schools depending on where your significant other might end up being at. I don't know if he does the same.

Once again, I try not to think of the possibilities in our future. Maybe we have to part our ways, who knows. But the more expectations or hopes you have, the more disappointments it will bring - I think. Ok, expectations are needed to continue a happy relationship - I am contradicting myself and confused about my own thoughts.

Note: I am NOT a relationship expert.